I haven’t blogged in years.

I’ve written some long captions on Instagram but I haven’t written written.

Is it like riding a bike? I’ve definitely tried to balance and pedal a few times but I would always topple over and I just didn’t feel like getting back up.

I started blogging in 2003. I was 15.

Holy shit. I just turned 32 last month. That means I’ve been blogging in some form or another for more than half of my life!

Blogspot, Livejournal, WordPress.com, Tumblr, BlogTV, WordPress.org, Plurk, Twitter, Instagram, and most recently podcasting with Jim on Spotify.

Don’t think I haven’t seen your questions sent to me thru various channels. The most-asked one:

Why aren’t you blogging anymore?

When I look back on my life, I see it as divided in two parts: BEFORE and AFTER child loss.

I didn’t want to look at my old life recorded on my blog. My cheeky pregnancy announcement post pisses me off somehow. Just writing this is creating a lump in my throat.

I’d like to thank the stranger who left this comment on my old post:

Thank you for your empathy.


Jim encouraged me to start a podcast months after we lost Luna. He could tell I missed having an outlet and knew it would help me deal with my depression. I agreed only if he would join me. It felt like the continuation of my blog but I had my best friend right beside me, holding my hand. I’m so grateful that he allowed himself to go outside of his comfort zone for my sake. Our Wake Up With Jim & Saab podcast community continues to grow but I do miss writing in my diary and sharing random stuff on this blog.

If blogging is indeed like riding a bike, well, today’s the day I take off my training wheels.

I can’t wait to feel the wind in my hair again!:)